"Wag More, Bark Less"
I was a raging bastard yesterday.
That sounds like a cool drink, no? A "Raging Bastard"? Is that a drink? If not, I'm making it up right now. And actually...I don't think that the ingredients are going to define this drink. I think that from this point forward, any drink I pour (it has to be from the hands of Kevin Charnas) is going to be called a "Raging Bastard".
So, if you're over and I pour you water, as soon as I pour it, it is therefore known as a "Raging Bastard".
If I pour you a nice glass of Chianti or Merlot, or Semillon, no matter, they will all transform themselves into "Raging Bastards"!
Even milk poured from these aging, sweaty, Greek/Irish hands will hence forth be known as a "Raging Bastard". So, even babies can have this drink of choice.
And when I die? So does the drink.
Dude...I LIKE this!
Or maybe I should pour the "Stupid Bitch"? Oh no...I just checked, it's already a drink. A stupid drink, appropriately, but still.
I'll stick with the "Raging Bastard". I like the sound.
Okay, so anyway...I was a raging bastard yesterday. (The person, not the drink.)
And I saw a bumper sticker that said, "WAG MORE, BARK LESS".
And I thought, yes...there've been plenty of times when I should've barked MUCH less and wagged MUCH more.
And to think that I have these two VERY FINE examples right in front of me daily...

Our little girl, Wednesday Addams.

And our handsome boy, Gomez Addams.
After all, there's no influence like an example...
So, I'm going to try to "Wag More" and "Bark Less".
At least for now.






7 Comments:
I have a car magnet that says that. I also have 3 spares. Want one? Email me your address & I will stick one in the mail for you! Just a reminder. Then you have to be nice when you drive, otherwise you are kind of a jerk, flipping people off with your Wag More magnet on...
You realize the wagging is referring to a tail and not your pee-pee, right?
Whit knows not of what he speaks, ignore him.
Aw, we all have days like those and have to remind ourselves that words are like toothpaste . . . kinda hard to get back in the tube once they're out.
The WORDS.
We could all benefit from a little less barking, I think.
i'm going to ask my bartender for a Raging Bastard tonight, then I will mock her for not being Kevin Charnas, which is what we really should all do to everyone who is not Kevin Charnas.
Very true! It would be nice if everyone would wag more. (Although we all have our barking days.)
I loved getting to see your babies as well. So cute!
Suebob - Thanks, sister. I just emailed you! If I can't flip them off, can I pee on them?
Whit - I think that it's left up to interpretation. 'Cause I thought they meant my scrotum.
Flutter - Who's "Whit"?
Carrie - I think so too. And more Frizbee.
Furious - Thanks, brother...You're one cool brother.
Hol & J - Thanks, friend...We happen to think that they're pretty cute too.
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