It doesn't matter who they think you are. It matters who you think you are.

Monday, November 05, 2007

The Goodness of The Baron and Molly

I've been wanting to tell you something about the party, but I haven't wanted to turn it into an all-out bitch-fest/tirade. As fun as that sounds...

We DID enjoy the party. And we DID enjoy most people that showed up. There were a couple that I'm not really sure why they showed. They told me how much they missed us, then they didn't even bother talking with Will, and were only there for about a half-hour, but I suppose that I should be happy that at least they made an appearance?

I don't want to talk about the people who didn't even respond, let alone the ones that thought that it was okay to send a regret on the day OF the party.

What I would say to them is you missed. You MISSED.

We essentially put on a casual wedding reception.

We provided dinner and dessert.

We provided a whole variation of drinks; good vodka, sangria, white wine punch, beer and non-alcoholic drinks.

We provided music (that Will worked for TWO weeks on), lighting and fog and a full-on dance floor.

And we provided LOTS of decorations for your viewing pleasure.

So, I don't want to turn this into anything nasty. I don't want to tell you how approximately 40+/- people who actually made it a point to tell us that not only were they coming, but they were bringing people, DIDN'T show.

Not only did they not show up. They haven't called or emailed to apologize.

Lie, for Christ's sake.

I fully understand that things come up. I get it.

However, you TOLD us that you were coming. So, we compensated for your arrival with spending more money and time on more food and wine.

I don't know what you happen to think of mine and Will's financial situation, but we live paycheck to paycheck. And we don't live extravagantly.

I want to give you the benefit of the doubt. I'll believe anything that you tell me. Tell me that your house BLEW UP or that you had explosive shit or that your dog had explosive shit.

I'm not going to ask for proof.

We invited you because we like you. And I still want to like you.

I would blame it on a "California" mentality of "It's all good". That people can flake at the last minute because they aren't feeling a right "vibe" or some such bullshit.

But, because of these two native Californians, I can't blame it on that...thank goodness.

The Baron and Molly

The Baron and Molly.

I first worked with The Baron in a theater group some years ago. When I first met The Baron, he was SO NICE that I thought he was fake.

It shows how bitter I've become.

The more I got to know The Baron, I thought, "There is NO WAY that this guy is truly this nice...He has GOT to be full of shit."

Then I met his parents. And they were just as nice.

And then we met Molly. And she was just as nice. And again, I thought, "NO FUCKING WAY..."

And then, Will and I met her parents. And they were just as nice.

And it turned out to be ME that was the one full of shit. I let the world fool me. I let the world lead me to believe that no one could be as nice as they. As true as they. As considerate and generous as they...

They show up on time.

They send "Thank You" cards.

And if something "comes up", they apologize.

They say what they mean and they do what they say.

They help restore my faith in people. And they lead me to question my own bitterness.

Kiss

And they remind me that love and kindness should be worn on one's sleeve.

And they remind me that good manners have NEVER gone out of style.

You see, I don't want to lose sight that MOST people DID show up. And MOST people who showed either emailed or called to thank us and tell us what a fantastic time they had. I don't want to lose sight that we DID have a great time. We laughed and danced and ate and drank. And we were merry. And the company in attendance was tremendous.

And for those of you who told us that you were coming and didn't show, it's okay, but you've got a tough act to follow.

Thank goodness.

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21 Comments:

Blogger Lisa Milton said...

Thank you, thank you for posting this today Kevin. I'm in a bitter betty mood, trying to shake it - this helped.

12:55 PM  
Blogger Nancy said...

Don't lose faith.
I try to surround myself with kind, like minded people, that way it give me patience to overlook the few dip-shits that slip into my life =)

1:07 PM  
Blogger furiousBall said...

People like The Baron and Molly are incredible aren't they? I have several friends like this. They leave you energized. It's freakin' great. You want to introduce them to people because you think others will benefit from them.

1:07 PM  
Blogger SHA said...

De-lurking to say the party looked sooooo over the top fun that had I not lived in Chicago, I would have loved to crash it.

1:48 PM  
Blogger Whit said...

Dude, I said I was sorry. I didn't know I had to go Ms. Manners on you.

Seriously though, I'm still bitter we couldn't go.

Your friends sound nice. I met some nice people one time. They glow.

2:06 PM  
Blogger Whit said...

Oh, I wanted to add (before I went on my sarcastic tangent) that this happened at our wedding. People say they are coming, bringing guests, some even called at the last minute to make sure it was okay they came despite not sending an RSVP, and then they no show. This after making sure we accounted for all of them at nearly $100 per person.

I'm freaking broke. Why did they think they it was okay to make me pay hundreds of dollars for nothing on my wedding day? These weren't the nice people.

2:09 PM  
Blogger cronznet said...

Next year you two come on over to my birthday party/fundraiser and let me throw alcohol, food and money down your gullets! Sorry some of your peeps disappointed you, and good for you for remembering that it is the good folks who matter, not the others.

3:08 PM  
Blogger flutter said...

Um and he wears a Burberry trench. That automatically makes them fabulous.

3:12 PM  
Blogger Queen of the Mayhem said...

Nothing makes me more annoyed that people who do not grasp the concept of RSVP!

It sounds like your party was a rousing success.....with or without the rude people!

Let's throw the next one in the deep south.....we'll make Mr. Mayhem pay for it! :)

6:51 PM  
Blogger Andie D. said...

People like the Baron and Molly are too few.

Why wouldn't you be pissed about those who said they would come and then didn't even have the decency to let you know that they WEREN'T GOING TO BE THERE?

I would've sent you guys an email, a hand written card, a video, flowers, chocolates, bottles of wine, AND all of my love if I were fortunate enough to celebrate Halloween in style with you.

P.S. I made my hub go through all of the pictures on flickr and we both kept saying, "Wow. Wow! Oh my god! How fucking cool! No way! WOW!"

P.P.S. Forgot the doggie treats for the pups. Would've sent doggie treats so they wouldn't feel left out.

8:57 PM  
Blogger carrie said...

The Baron and Molly are adorable!

And for the record, I would never flake on a party of yours. Never!

11:25 PM  
Blogger Pendullum said...

Yeah to Baron and Molly... They are goodness...
As well as you and Will... How wonderful to organize such a party for friends... Pure goodness of the heart.. That is why we love you so....
The people who had bad manners...
Heck, that's what it is ... that and self absorbed...
Do glad you guys had a great time...
And I would so loved to have been there...

7:52 AM  
Blogger Open Grove Claudia said...

I think people can be incredibly rude. We have an entire social group that is so rude, we politely say they have an interesting way of interacting. I'm not really sure what it is - I think people think of other people in terms of what they are going to get from them and expect you to do the same. So it doesn't matter how rude they are, you need them. At least that's what I've come up with.

God bless the Baron and Molly! :)

BTW, I'm a forth generation Californian. (squinting eyes at you) I'm sure you didn't mean ME in your generalization about Californians.

9:35 AM  
Blogger jennster said...

it IS like throwing a reception... we had TWENTY people not show up to our wedding. twenty fucking assholes who said they were coming. twenty fucking pricks who INSISTED on bringing dates, and then DID NOT COME. we paid for these people. my filthy rich parents (which i don't have) didn't pay for the wedding. WE DID. it's fucking rude. it's rude as fuck. and now i'm all pissed off again.

i hate everyone. lol

9:59 AM  
Blogger mamatulip said...

Yay for good friends and good parties...when people don't show up that just means there's more alcohol, right? (Seriously though, that is one of my biggest pet peeves...)

10:19 AM  
Blogger heartinsanfrancisco said...

I often wonder (loudly) why so many people have so few manners. We seem to live in a self-absorbed world in which others are considered mere stage props.

You and Will deserve so much better. You opened your home and your hearts, you spent money and energy to create a fun and memorable evening.

Some people just suck, but luckily, not all. Unfortunately, it's sometimes hard to know which are which until the results are in.

It sounds like a fantastic party, though. Cheers!

5:52 PM  
Anonymous Moobs said...

The trouble is that I am desperate to be nice but I find I just cannot sustain it. The vein of bitterness that runs through me means I'm never more than 2 minutes from a snide aside; never more than 30 seconds from judging someone. I am jealous of effortlessly nice people with sunny dispositions who just cannot help but see the good in others. So jealous I hate them.

6:25 PM  
Anonymous kathryn said...

kathryn here, Molly's bestest friend. Yes, she's the coolest girl there is, and she and the Baron put us all to shame.
I totally sympathize with your rant. Boyfriend and I had a very proper cocktail party a bit ago and people did the same thing....
Humanity sucks 'cept for a few really awesome folks.

7:27 PM  
Blogger kim said...

Im glad you can get it out, I would internalize and make excuses for their bad behavior and resent that Im making excuses for people who dont deserve it! Cuz thats how fucked up I am lol
I looked through those pictures with Dick and we both agree, Will is EXTREMELY talented and you both throw a kick ASS party! Please pack up Will and come up north to visit and hang out with us!

8:20 PM  
Blogger sweatpantsmom / marsha tm said...

To the people that didn't show - their loss. Seriously, it was the bestest Halloweenie party evah - and this coming from someone who doesn't even like the holiday.

Sorry I was a little preoccupied making sure Kiyomi didn't freak out. Like I said in my email, they wanted to come see you the next morning, so I know they still had a good time.

7:09 PM  

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