Searching For Ground...
I very badly have wanted to post something funny the last few days...But, if I were to be honest with you, I'm holding my breath. Afraid that if I breathe, I'll crack and crumble.
I actually feel as though I've been holding my breath for a month. We're awaiting some news. Some news that is scaring the shit out of me.
I began to write something for my Dad on Father's Day. And then, his Birthday was at the end of June. He turned 80. And I was going to write something about how he's still riding his motorcycle, still flying his plane, still golfing and playing tennis and cutting down dead limbs in trees.
But, I couldn't.
Afraid that if I opened the flood gates, while holding my breath, I'd be washed away.
Kind of like, what I'm on the verge of right now.
I'm 2500 miles away from him and my mother and feeling rather helpless.
I know that I've been extremely lucky to have my Dad for this long. And I know that I've been extremely lucky to have a Dad that wasn't afraid to hug me, kiss me or tell me that he loves me on a regular basis. And I know that I've been extremely lucky to have a Dad that is as good of a man as he.
But, I'm scared.
And I can't sleep.
And my chest is tightening with a worry that I'm afraid will envelope me.
If you have any extra good thoughts or prayers lying around, if you could send them his way, I'd be much obliged...
The water is rising and beginning to spill...
The screen is getting too blurry...
Thank you...
Here's my Dad checking out the view on Maui.
I don't think that he was looking at the water...or the sand. That frisky devil.
Stumble It!
posted by Kevin Charnas | 5:42 AM
50 Comments:
(((HUGS))) for Dad! :)
Oh, and you know what they say - only the good die young so I dont see his little naughty self going anywhere anytime soon. ;)
Aw Kevin - hang in there, and I'll send some prayers y'all's way from Texas.
Look at that smile, he's got good taste in beach views too. My Dad had a quad bypass 4 years ago and I worry like you too. Dads are such rocks for us that are lucky enough to have good ones. Which is why I remind myself daily how important I am to my short people...that helps me be less of a moron ...usually.
Kevin,
I am so sorry to hear about your Dad and I will keep you and him in my thoughts. Know that I am thinking about you are yours.
Much love (xoxoxox),
Jessica
My thoughts and prayers will be for your dad Kevin. You know,you will always have him, it shows with your words.
**hugs**
Nancy
beautiful post. my thoughts are with you.
Lisa
Thinking of you. Hugs for you and Dad both.
Just back from visiting the 'folks' back home myself - very sobering, very scary - we're right with you dearie.
Cheers
((hugs)) to you and your dad. I hope everything's ok.
Thinking of you and your dad, hope all is ok.
Good thoughts and wishes heading your way.......
I will hold you, and your father, in my thoughts and prayers.
Kev,
Susan and I are thinking of you guys and sending you all kinds of good thoughts, blessings, and love.
xoxo,
K
Oh sweet cheeks, you have all my happy thoughts wrapped aropund you!
Hugs, good thoughts, and prayers coming right up.
All my good thoughts are yours!
Thinking of you and Dad!
From my heart to yours......stillness, love, hope, and the knowledge of knowing that there is a bigger picture for us all. My prayers are with you and yours.
Kevie!!
I'll hold my breath with you. And I'll cross all my fingers. And I'll send up good thoughts to the great unknown.
A squeeze from me to keep you strong.
love,
mamma
You look a lot like him, Kevin. I'm sending you good wishes.
He'll be OK, and if he isn't -- you are a wonderful legacy for him to leave. I can see the pride in his eyes when he is photographed with you. Be good to yourself. Thoughts & prayers for you and Dad & Mom.
Your dad is a lucky man to have a loving son like you.
You must have learned from the best.
He's in my prayers ... so are you.
Kevin,
Please know that you, your dad, and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
((hugs))
Holly
Kevin, your dad and you are both in my thoughts and prayers...all my best to your family. ((HUGS))
hey kevin...i send you my best man.
P.S. sorry about the toilet flushing existence staring out into space comment 8minutes ago...didn't know how things were going
PPS I hate being ants ...running along in this busy colony...never taking "real" time to say, "Hello...how is everything going?"
PPPS hope all is well.
Kevin, my thoughts are with you and your family. I've been in a similar position, feeling like my chest is going to explode, unable to function...just worried. Scared.
You're not alone, even though you might feel like you are.
Sending lots of strength and positivity to you and your father.
Sweetheart, would it be possible for you to get on a plane and go there? If so, GO GO GO! Maybe it would help, you, your dad and your mum?Lots of love to you and your dad. -M
Oh, sweet Kevin! Why is it that when we know how lucky we are to have something/someone we also feel as though we have to whisper how badly we need them in our lives. We must tiptoe so that the fates will not hear us crossing the creaky floorboards of life in an attempt to clasp those loved ones close to us...for fear their value will be recognized and claimed by those same fates for themselves? Did that even make sense? Your love for your family is obvious and, OHMYGOD, they've demonstrated so well how much they love you. They should be the poster parents for fabulous parenting and unconditional love, which--of course--the way it is supposed to be done in the first place. The world has so much to learn from them and please know that we're here for you. Whatever the days bring your way, we will face it along with you.
not hard to see where you get it from, is it? The twinkle? The spark? You have all of the good thoughts and prayers...
Oh Kevin, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. How lucky you are to have such loving supportive parents.
Times like this just suck. My heart goes out to you.
BIG hugs
Kevin, we are all with you...I too wish I could give you an in-person hug, but a long-distance one will have to suffice. Will be thinking of you and your Dad...much love, my dear.
(((You)))
(((Your dad)))
Kevin, I wish I could make that a real hug. Know I'm thinking of, and caring about, you both.
Lover and light to you both handsome.
Thinking of you
x
Kev, we are thinking about you and your Dad... sending much love and prayers from all of us.
Love you! Jodi, Bill and Liam XOXOXO
Such a sweet post. You and your Dad are both very lucky men.
That first photo could be a postcard. Awesome.
(wow). I picked a day to pass by. I have that fear as well. Not abt your Dad, but abt the mother person. Maybe I will put it in writing. Not now.
NOW I am over at Christina's with a batch of margaritas. I invited superstar to join me, and wanted to see if you were available.
*I will have you know this post of yours REALLY has my mind (moving...)
Be well, Kev.
Hugs for you. Strength for your father.
I'm here for you.
Many prayers and loving thoughts to you and your parents.
Big squeeze for you!
Hoping with every inch of my heart that you receive some good news -- soon!
Carrie
ps. I love all the pics.
I keep up with you through my blogfeeds, Kevin, even if I don't always comment. But I feel compelled to tell you that your last post made me pee my pants a little. And this post made my heart ache. You've a way with words, my friend.
Thinking of you and wishing you well.
I have begun a campaign of God-bothering for your Dad. Hang in there big man.
Wishing you and your family well well well.
L.A. Family has you deep in our thoughts!
You are deep in my thoughts....
And wish you all a stones throw away...
Oh Kevin...I'm sending you a big e-hug too and lots of positive thoughts.
I'll go to a beach and snap pics of the scantily clad for your father, and send along with massive amounts of positive energy.
Hugs for you and your dad!
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